Mentoring

Background 

Jaq Athorn came to Cranfield Trust shortly after being promoted into a role that, for the first time, made her responsible for supporting and managing a team. A trauma counsellor by background, she found herself navigating unfamiliar territory. “I had just been promoted into a role which meant supporting the team and making sure that we were working legally, ethically, and so on,” she explains. “I’d had no experience of it.” 

Challenge 

Jaq wanted to grow into the managerial side of her new role and learn how to bring out the best in the people around her. “I wanted to learn some skills,” she says, “to support the team in the best way possible.” But she also had a more personal challenge in mind. One particular working relationship had become difficult, and she wanted help navigating it. “It felt like we were constantly pushing back with each other,” she recalls. 

Underlying this was something Jaq recognised in herself: a strong fight-or-flight response when she felt uncomfortable. “I wanted to be able to manage that better, so that I could keep a level head,” she says. What she was looking for was someone to help her steady that response, communicate with more clarity, and approach a tricky situation from a calmer place. 

Solution 

Cranfield Trust matched Jaq with volunteer mentor Tina Stevenson, and the connection was immediate. “It was ridiculously easy,” Jaq says. “There was such a warmth about her and an openness … it was just a natural connection. She got me, and I felt completely comfortable with her. Nothing I could say was stupid, nothing I could say would be judged.” That trust, she felt, was the reason the mentoring worked so quickly: “We didn’t have to work on building a trusting relationship, it just came naturally.” 

Tina is modest about her approach. “I was better at listening than I thought I would be,” she says, “we clicked really quickly and developed trust and a really honest approach to things.” Her method centred on reflecting Jaq's own words back to her in a new way. “Sometimes I would reflect it back using slightly different language, so that it reframed things for her and made her look at it differently. It gave her the ability to look at something through a different lens.” 

Crucially, Tina was unwavering in her support. “I was very firmly always in her corner,” she says. “Whatever decisions she wanted to make, I was going to be a cheerleader for that.”  

Impact 

The impact on Jaq was, in her own words, immediate and significant. “It's already had a massive impact,” she says. Working with Tina helped her notice how her imposter syndrome was feeding into negative self-talk. “Tina helped me pick those bits out and really challenged me on my language.” 

Where Jaq had tended to be over-apologetic, she learned to communicate with more confidence and clearer boundaries. “Tina really helped me be much more supportive, but with boundaries and clarity, which got better results and built my confidence quite a lot.” Tina also encouraged her to celebrate her successes and to believe in her own potential. “She really celebrated my wins, and I'm not good at celebrating my wins,” Jaq says. “She encouraged me to learn new skills, whereas I was a bit terrified. She was like, you have the potential to do this. You can do this.” 

The most significant outcome was a moment of clarity. Jaq had always felt she had to stay in the senior role because there was no one else to step into it. Through her reflection with Tina, she came to a different conclusion. “I recognised that just because I can do this job doesn't mean I have to,” she says. With that realisation, she made the decision to step back from the managerial role and return to the frontline work she loves. 

For Tina, it was exactly the right call. “I felt like she could have filled any of the roles that were options for her,” she says. “But in making that clear and explicit to her, it meant she could actually make a choice about which one she wanted. She stepped away from the more senior role and back into frontline practice, and that’s a decision I think she's incredibly happy with.” 

Jaq is in no doubt about what made the difference. “Without Tina being able to really challenge my thought process and this feeling that I'm not good enough, to then finally realise that just because I can do it doesn't mean I have to, that has been a massive learning curve,” she says. “I get to go back to doing what I love. I'm very grateful to Tina, and to Cranfield Trust for putting me with her. Without that connection, I don't think I'd have got where I am today. I feel very blessed.”